5-sentence review of ‘The Walking Dead: Strangers’

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The Walking Dead” | Season 5, Episode 2: “Strangers” | Date: Oct. 19, 2014


  1. The word that comes to mind after “The Walking Dead” introduced a band of cannibalistic hunters who eat Bob’s (Lawrence Gilliard, Jr.) leg is “gratuitous.”
  2. It was gratuitous even in the context of a show that is largely about inventive ways to smash zombie skulls.
  3. The obscene violence of the series doesn’t ruffle me too much, but it is a problem as it goes forward.
  4. It comes at the expense of character development and story (which I realize no one cares about because they’re mostly in it for the juicy squish of zombie mayhem) and it forces the series creative team to get grosser and more vile with each episode.
  5. I wonder when it gets to be too much for the audience, but with episode ratings that shatter cable TV records and eclipse most broadcast shows on the same night, maybe blood-spatter cruelty and soggy monsters is what people really want.

5-sentence review of ‘The Walking Dead’ Season 5, Episode 1: ‘No Sanctuary’

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The Walking Dead” | Season 5, Episode 1: “No Sanctuary” | Date: Oct. 12, 2014


  1. “The Walking Dead” officially became torture porn Sunday, with its blood-soaked fifth season premiere.
  2. The show once inspired thought about how humanity would face its potential extinction.
  3. Now it’s just humans bashing people’s brains in with aluminum bats and killing slitting throats.
  4. The opening scene in the slaughterhouse reminded me of “Hostel 2″ or one of the umpteen “Saw” movies.
  5. And no, gore lovers, that is not meant as a compliment; “The Walking Dead” has taken a turn for the terrible.

TV Report: ‘The Walking Dead: A’ Season 4 finale

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Season 4, Episode 16: “A” | Original air date: March 30, 2014

The Walking Dead” final was the best episode of a weak fourth season. It was stronger in action and drama than the most of the previous 15 episodes. It didn’t make up for the dull, draining and repetitive march to get to this point, but it’s was a rare sign of life in this series about the zombie apocalypse.

Rick (Andrew Lincoln), Michonne (Danai Gurira) and Carl (Chandler Riggs) are surrounded by the gang of rednecks Daryl (Norman Reedus) has been hanging with since Beth (Emily Kinney) was kidnapped … or ran off … or whatever. Rick killed one of the rednecks’ guys while he and his gang were napping at a house early in the second half of the season.

The rednecks decide to go “Deliverance” on Carl and kill everybody else, including Daryl, who stuck up for his pals. Rick kills the lead redneck by biting him in the neck zombie-style. This weirds out Carl. Later Michonne confesses to having done gross things to her stoner friends who let her son get killed. Everybody is a monster these days. It’s a lot of exposition and not particularly revealing given what we’ve already seen on screen.

With Daryl in tow, the group arrive at Terminus. In the words of Admiral Ackbar, “It’s a trap!” Rick spies Glenn’s (Steven Yeun) pocketwatch, a gift from the beheaded Hershel (Scott Wilson), on one of the seemingly friendly types at Terminus, as well as riot gear and a panco that belonged to members of his survivors. They try to shoot their way out, but are led into a trap. They’re locked into a train care with Glenn, Maggie (Lauren Cohan) and most of the rest of the gang.

Rick ends the season with an attempt at a tough guy line: “They’re gonna feel pretty stupid when they found out … they’re messin’ with the wrong people.”

Carol (Melissa McBride) and Tyreese (Chad Coleman), fresh from killing all the children in their care except baby Judith, Rick’s daughter, haven’t showed up at Terminus yet. And then, of course, there’s poor Beth, who disappeared in a car several episodes ago. Perhaps a big team up leads to another shootout with the people of Terminus.

This has not been a very good season of “The Walking Dead.” But this was a good episode and it was enough to sell me on watching the season premier next fall. So at a very basic level, the series did its job. But when it comes to level of entertainment, the series has seen a sharp decline. It will take more than catch phrases and a good cliffhanger to keep me watching.

Then again, maybe it doesn’t. The ratings are the best they’ve ever been and despite my displeasure, I watched every damned episode. Maybe it’s the show that can do no wrong and sets out to prove it.

TV Report: ‘The Walking Dead: Us’

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Season 4, Episode 15: “Us” | Original air date: March 23, 2014

The Walking Dead” is out of surprises. This disappointing season has plodded along, especially in the second half, feeling dazed and tired. The show has resorted to low-rent trickery to create faux drama.

This week, Glenn Rhee (Steven Yeun) and Tara (Alanna Masterson) break off from the group of nitwits who think Eugene (Josh McDermitt) is a scientist with the cure for the zombie apocalypse. Glenn and Tara march through a dark tunnel with only a flashlight.

The tunnel is filled with zombies. Surprise. Tara slips and gets her foot caught in rubble. This is possible the second-oldest cliche in the horror genre. The oldest is when a damsel slips and falls when being chased by a monster. Which Tara did earlier in the episode.

Also, Tara is gay. And she has a crush on Alisha (Juliana Harkavy), one of the dopes trying to get Eugene to Washington, D.C. Perhaps “The Walking Dead” is going to incorporate some lesbian love scenes in future episodes. The show has been pretty heteronormative up to this point. Gays need love at the end of the world, too.

Elsewhere, Rick (Andrew Lincoln), Carl (Chandler Riggs) and Michonne (Danai Gurira) walk along train tracks. Michonne loses a bet and is forced to split a candybar with Carol. Look everyone. These three misfits have become a family.

Daryl (Norman Reedus) adjusts to life in his new gang of losers. Their leader tries to convince Daryl he’s still a bad guy by using slogans from the Southern redneck greeting card line. Example: “There’s nothing sadder than an outside cat who thinks its an inside cat.” Or something like that. Maybe it was “Stupid is as stupid does.” I forget. 

Glenn and Tara are rescued in the tunnel by Eugene’s group, who joined up with Maggie (Lauren Cohan), Bob (Lawrence Gilliard, Jr.) and Sasha (Sonequa Martin-Green). They shoot a lot of zombies. Glenn and Maggie reunite. It’s a Hallmark moment. Then Maggie burns the picture Glenn took of her while she slept.

She said she did it because he wouldn’t need a picture of her anymore as they would always be together. I think she did it because girls have a weird thing about having their picture taken while they are asleep. At least that’s what I’ve heard. I certainly don’t have any direct knowledge of that.

A conspiracy theorist might suggest that this is foreshadowing and that Maggie is likely doomed because she burned her own photo. It may also be bad voodoo in some ancient Haitian cultures, the same people who created the zombie legends.

I doubt it. Lauren Cohan mentions are the highest getting traffic items on this blog. People like her, or at least looking at her. I do, too.

I really don’t have much to say about this episode. Most of the season seems like a placeholder. But, frankly, I enjoyed it. At this point in the year, I’m happy for any programing that isn’t about broken brackets, squeaking shoes and dimwitted former jocks spouting cliches like a flamethrower of obviousness.

So my standards may be kind of low.

TV Review: ‘The Walking Dead: The Grove’

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Season 1, Episode 14: “The Grove” | Original air date: March 16, 2014

“The Grove” provides the most moral and emotionally resonant moment in the largely disappointing fourth season of “The Walking Dead.” Yet even then it is dipped in repetitive tedium that’s drug the show down, especially in the second half.

Carol (Melissa McBride) travels with Tyreese (Chad Coleman),  Mika (Kyla Kenedy) and her older sister, Lizzie (Brighton Sharbino), and Rick’s infant daughter, Judith.

The group comes across a beautiful, unspoiled house with a fence, pecan trees and deer in the area. They decide to stop traveling along the train tracks and set up a home here. Guess where this is headed. Yeah, it all goes to hell, just like it did for each group of characters who scattered way from the prison after it was destroyed in the mid-season finale.

They keep playing that same note with only slight variation. Everybody is headed toward the much built-up survivor city of Terminis now, with two episodes left in the season. Also, in case you were wondering, everyone is sad, emotionally damaged and probably quite smelly at this point.

Carol continues to preach survival skills to the young girls in her charge, to be hardened killers, just like her. This is parenting in the zombie apocalypse. Kill or be killed is the new golden rule.

Lizzie seems on the verge of mental collapse. She treats the zombies as pets and considers letting one bite her. Then, of course, a horde of scorched zombies waddle out of the woods. , Carol and the girls blast away. Carol is pleased by the way Lizzie pumps out ammo as fast as she can pull the trigger.

Lizzie seems stronger and more well-adjusted after the murder fest. Then she stabs Mika to death in order to turn her into a zombie. It turns out she was the one feed rats to the zombies at the prison, which lead to the weakening of the fence for hordes. She also filleted a rat for fun. If Dr. Phil were still alive, he would suggest young Lizzie has the the markings of a future serial killer.

So Carol, who is good at executing her fellow survivors in the name of survival, takes Lizzie for a walk in the wildflowers, shoots and kills her. Later, Carol confesses to Tyresse that she murdered Karen (Melissa Ponzio), his girlfriend, and David, to stop the spread of the flu.

She slides a gun across the table to Tyreese and says, “Do what you have to do.” Tyreese forgives her in perhaps the most impressive moment of the season.

But it’s also another sign of why the series has run thin. They only way to manufacture drama at this point is to kill characters, whether they be freshly introduced newbies destined to become zombie bait or established characters who are killed for the sake of keeping the body count rising and Chris Hardwick in hashtags.

The concept has played out. They’ve got nothing left to surprise the viewer. People keep watching. The show pulls numbers that puts a lot of network shows to shame. But a lot of people like Peeps, the Easter candy. In neither case does it mean they’re right.

TV Review: ‘The Walking Dead: Alone’

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Season 4, Episode 13: “Alone” | Original air date: March 9, 2014

So “The Walking Dead” is now “The Lord of the Rings.” Most episodes are spent walking around and contemplating life after the zombie apocalypse.

I probably shouldn’t compare the series to “The Lord of the Rings.” There are people who think that stuff is really good, both in print and cinematic forms. I don’t. I find it dull, just as I find “The Walking Dead” dull in this half of a season.

We learn how drunken medic Bob (Lawrence Gilliard, Jr.) came to be with the former prison crew in the cold opening. Glenn (Steven Yeun) and Daryl (Norman Reedus) ask the usual series of questions. How many zombies have you killed? How many people have you killed? Blah. Blah. Blah.

There’s no clear reason why this scene is in the episode, but when you’ve got half an hour worth of plot and an hour to fill, this is the kind of stuff you get.

Daryl and Beth (Emily Kinney) do some walking. The find a funeral home and raid the food stores. Beth gets kidnapped. This would be interesting, but the writers have chosen to show us Bob falling in love with Sasha (Sonequa Martin-Green). They kiss. Everybody swoon.

Sasha wants to stop walking (you go, girl!) and set up shop in a nice railroad station. Their walking companion, Maggie (Lauren Cohan), though, wants to keep looking for Glenn. So she walks off on her own.

Bob and Sasha give chase. Sasha decides to stay at a railway station. Bob goes on. Sasha discovers Maggie lying on the ground next to the train tracks. Sasha breaks a window. This alerts the zombies.

It’s not really clear why Maggie was sleeping on the ground or why Sasha is breaking windows. But making sense really isn’t the point of this show. It’s the juicy squish of zombie killing and pretending the rest of the nonsense trimmed around that is a deeper drama than it really is.

Daryl goes looking for Beth. He meets up with a gang of rednecks. He decides to join up. I think they’re trying to tell me that Daryl’s evolution into a good guy is easily undone once he loses the anchor of the more moral characters on the show, like his almost girlfriend, Beth.

But it mostly feels like the writers are introducing us to a bunch of new characters who will be killed in the coming weeks, i.e. red shirts on “Star Trek.”

Maggie, Bob and Sasha decide to go to Terminus, the magic city at the end of the railroad tracks. Elsewhere, Glenn finds a sign to Terminus, too. He’s on his way. Everybody is going to have a reunion.

Yippie.

TV Review: ‘The Walking Dead: Still’

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Season 4, Episode 12: “Still” | Original air date: March 2, 2014

Beth (Emily Kinney) is bored with survival and a mopy Daryl (Norman Reedus) and decides to go get drunk. Daryl, still a good redneck, throws in.

They raid a country club. Beth gets a new golf shirt and a sweater. Daryl insensitively gets zombie blood on the white sweater when he crushes a zombie skull with a good titanium driver.

Eventually, they find the bar, but Daryl refuses to let Beth take her first taste from lowly peach schnapps. So they go to a moonshiner’s shack, where they get drunk and have a domestic dispute, cry and then burn the shack down. This is probably what passes for what a good Southern debutante ball after the zombie apocalypse.

I’ve been pretty rough on “The Walking Dead” this season, but I liked this episode. Not a lot happened and it was low on the juicy squish, but it felt like one of the episodes of “M*A*S*H” when there wasn’t a lot of casualties coming in. People get bored even at the end of the world.

And if you’re Beth, a teetotaling preacher’s daughter, you probably would want to raise a little hell, especially if you saw your father decapitated. I’m surprised the episode didn’t end in her and Daryl having sex. It might have grossed out the puritans, but it would’ve seemed fairly natural given the situation and the booze.

I wouldn’t mind seeing “The Walking Dead” do a few more episodes like this. There are things about the zombie apocalypse that are never addressed. For example, the survivors are always going into old buildings filled with dead bodies and rotten food. Nobody ever mentions how terrible those places must smell. Just once, somebody should throw up.

Speaking of smell, can you imagine the body odor of these people? I mean it’s not like they’re hitting the showers after a hard day of zombie squish.

These are the kinds of things I think about when I watch “The Walking Dead” because the plot doesn’t interest me anymore. I’m supposed to be emotionally moved by the fact Daryl and Beth are all choked up that all their friends and family are dead.

But I’m not. The show has played that note too many times. I’m bored with it. What I enjoyed was Daryl and Beth burning the shack down. There probably aren’t very many good therapists left at the end of the world, but a good shack burning is pretty therapeutic.

TV Review: ‘The Walking Dead: Claimed’

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Season 4, Episode 11: “Claimed” | Original air date: Feb. 23, 2014

The sleepy second half of the fifth season of “The Walking Dead” slogged incrementally forward Sunday, dragging its feet like a the shuffle steps a zombie with a broken ankle.

The writers want me to believe there is deep drama in the personal traumas of the survivors, but it just isn’t working. I’ve become cold and callous to the plights of these people. I just don’t care anymore.

Carl (Chandler Riggs) jokes with Michonne (Danai Gurira) at breakfast. The topic was soy milk. That’s never funny. Carl mentions his sister, Judith, and her formula. He gets sad and walks out of the room. Rick (Andrew Lincoln) still suffers from the effects of the beating the Governor gave him in the mid-season finale.

It feels like the whole show suffers a hangover from the moment the Governor blew up the prison with his tank and was ultimately killed by Michonne. I suppose I can’t expect tank warfare every episode, but I can, at least, hope for some good juicy squish and even that hasn’t been that good this half.

We learn more about Abe Ford (Michael Cudlitz) and his group, who rescued Glenn (Steven Yeun) and Tara (Alanna Masterson). One guy, Dr. Eugene Porter (Josh McDermitt), claims to be a scientist who was in contact with Washington, D.C. until recently. He allegedly knows what caused the zombie apocalypse. I don’t trust him. I’ve never known a scientist with a mullet before.

Rick is napping with a book of Jack London short stories. That will put most people to sleep. A gang raids the house. He hides under the bed, eventually escapes and he, Carl and Michonne start walking along the railroad tracks to the mysterious sanctuary town where Tyreese, Carol and his band were headed last episode.

In other circumstances, I might give this episode the benefit of the doubt of being a “tweener,” one that falls in between major plot points and sort of moves the characters about on the playing field in buildup toward future action. But the action so far this half season has been so sparse, and the anguish of the characters so overplayed, that I’m inclined to believe it’s just dull.

5-paragraph review of ‘The Walking Dead: Inmates’

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Season 4, Episode 10: “Inmates” | Original air date: Feb. 16, 2014

1.) “The Walking Dead” continued its “Where are they now?” narrative following the fall of the prison. Daryl (Norman Reedus) and Hershel’s other daughter, Beth (Emily Kinney), run in the woods. Daryl shoots zombies with his crossbow. She nags Daryl to go looking for the others. He says mean things about faith and her dead daddy. She pouts. They walk more. She stabs a zombie in the head. They find some of their prison pals being eaten by zombies. Beth cries. Daryl walks. That night, they build a fire. Beth vows to keep her father’s faith. I vow not to make a comment about how boring this is. I break it almost immediately.

2.) In other news about characters nobody cares about, Tyreese (Chad Coleman) is now the head of the post-zombie apocalypse elementary school, with the psychotic kids, Lizzie (Brighton Sharbino) and her sister, Mika (Kyla Kenedy). Tyreese also ended up with Rick’s infant daughter, Judith. The kids whimper and whine. Tyreese kills zombies with a hammer, which is cool. Then Carol (Melissa McBride) shows up. Rick banished Carol because she murdered people infected with the flu in hopes of stopping its spread. It didn’t work. One of the people killed was Tyreese’s girlfriend. He doesn’t know Carol killed them. See? There’s real drama here, folks. This isn’t just a show about juicy squish. Somebody engrave a writing Emmy for these people. Or not.

3.) Maggie (Lauren Cohan) and yet more useless characters  — Bob (Lawrence Gilliard, Jr.), the alcoholic medic, and Sasha (Sonequa Martin-Green), Tyreese’s sister, find the bus that escaped the compound filled with zombies. Maggie wants to know if her husband, Glenn (Steven Yeun), is one of them. So they let them out and kill them all. Then Maggie cries and laughs. I would have, too, if they hadn’t shown us Glenn was alive in the preview.

4.) Glenn is back at the prison. He cries for a while, too. There’s a lot of crying in this episode. Then he gears up like an action hero complete with armor and a helmet. He charges into a horde of zombies. The inventive director of photography shows viewers what the zombie horde looks like to Glenn through his plastic mask. This is just what this show needed. Cinematography that mimics first-person shooter video games. Now this is Emmy-winning work.

5.) Glenn teams up with Tara (Alanna Masterson), still another useless character. Tara is the sister of the woman who shacked up with the Governor before he attacked the prison. Glenn uses Bob’s whiskey for a Molotov cocktail. Bob risked his life for that booze. Now it’s burning zombies. What a shame. Glenn and Tara fight some zombies. Then a military unit shows up. The end. Of this episode, I mean. This show, unfortunately, goes on.

5-paragraph review of ‘The Walking Dead: After’

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Season 4, Episode 9: “After” | Original air date: Feb. 9, 2014

1.) I’ve decided to watch “The Walking Dead” the same way I watched “American Horror Story: Coven” this year. Instead of trying to glean any kind of story or drama out of this gross-out festival, I’m just going to watch for the juicy squish. More people than ever watch this show, so I’m not going to dissuade anyone by pointing out the plot is dumb and the characters are weaker than ever before. So I’m not doing that. From now on, it’s just zombie mash. No more, even though that’s much less.

2.) The first episode of the second half of the fourth season begins with the prison burning after the events of the mid-season finale. Michonne (Danai Gurira) arrives with her sword. She takes a pair of zombies, cuts off their arms and lower jaws and makes them into her walking buddies. She finds the decapitated head of Hershel (Scott Wilson). She pokes it with her sword the way work-release prisoners stab trash with sticks along the highway.

3.) Rick (Andrew Lincoln) and Carl (Chandler Riggs) have a domestic dispute. Carl is mad at his dad. Carl and Rick take shelter in a house. Carl hangs out in a teenager’s bedroom and reads a book. Rick sleeps on the couch by the door. The next morning he is unresponsive after the beating he took at the hands of the Governor (David Morrissey) last episode. Carl decides to play chicken with a group of zombies. This leads to problems. It’s OK. He shoots his way out of it. Then he throws up. Because those three zombies are the ones too gross for him. He yells at his unconscious father that he’s not been a very good leader and he’d be fine if Rick died. It’s true. Carl is pretty tough. Carl’s biggest weakness is Chandler Riggs’ acting.

4.) Michonne has a nightmare about two dudes in her old home where she kept a sword in the knife cozy. There was a child. It probably means something, but no zombies were killed, so forget it. Later she walks in the woods with her new pets. She sees a African-American, now a zombie. It’s nice to see that the color barrier isn’t an issue in the zombie apocalypse. But the zombie has dreadlocks, too. This is too much for the fashion-conscious Michonne. She cuts that zombie’s head off and then all of the other zombies’ heads off, including her new pets. She looks anguished. Later she cries in a cabin and talks to herself.

5.) Carl goes out to forage for supplies. He goes into a house and is overpowered by a zombie. He uses the last of his ammo but doesn’t finish off the zombie. The zombie takes his shoe. Carl gets away. Carl writes on the door with chalk. He’s pleased with himself. He eats pudding out of a giant can on the rooftop with one shoe. If I would think the writers were being funny, but I don’t think they’re that clever. Later, the seriously concussed Rick falls off the couch. Carl thinks he might have died and become a zombie. But he can’t kill him. Apparently, he’s not as tough as previously stated. But Rick survived to give Carl the “you’re a man, now” speech. It’s like a post-apocalyptic bar mitzvah for rednecks. Later Rick may teach him to shave. Michonne walks up to the house where Carl and Rick are staying. Because of course she would. Her sword probably has GPS tracking powered by zombie blood. It makes about as much sense as anything else. Anyway, the band is slowly getting back together. But it feels like 2014 Rolling Stones, not 1966 Rolling Stones.

5-paragraph review of ‘The Walking Dead: Too Far Gone’

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Season 4, Episode 8: “Too Far Gone”

Original air date: Dec. 1, 2013

  1. The fourth season of “The Walking Dead” limped into its midseason finale with another yawner. There was plenty of of action in the last 15 minutes. Some characters we cared about were killed, as were characters we met three episodes ago and were supposed to care about but really didn’t. Nothing happened that was terribly surprising or all that interesting.
  2. The Governor (David Morrissey) storms the prison with his new group of rubes, one of whom has a tank. The Governor apparently captured Hershel (Scott Wilson) and Michonne (Danai Gurira). That might have been shown, but I watched big chunks of the episode on fast-forward to avoid all the blather.
  3. And there was plenty of blather. There were speeches to be made by the Governor about how they need to take the prison and kill everybody because it’s the right thing to do. Hershel made a speech about how they could all live in harmony. Rick (Andrew Lincoln) later made a speech about how everybody could live in harmony. It sounded a lot like the speech Hershel made about 15 minutes earlier. It was like “The Walking Dead: C-SPAN.”
  4. Anyway, about 45 minutes into the episode the Governor and his rubes finally attack the prison. He beheads Hershel. The Governor and Rick have a fistfight. The Governor wins. The Michonne runs him through with her sword. Other people we barely knew died. The Governor’s new girlfriend, whose name I didn’t bother to learn, shot the Governor through the head just so we know he’s dead. Earlier in the episode, the cute little tow-headed blonde girl that is her daughter, also a name I didn’t bother to learn, was bitten by a zombie. I guess she thought that was the Governor’s fault. I don’t know. Women can be fickle.
  5. These eight episodes were the highest rated in the series’ history. I thought they were the eight worst episodes. So there’s no accounting for taste. I don’t know if I will watch the remaining eight episodes of the season when it comes back in February. The series had drug on and stumbled so much that I really don’t care what happens to any of these characters. AMC has one more season of “Mad Men” left and then AMC is out of excellent programming. Well, I guess there’s “Comic Book Men.”

5-paragraph review of ‘The Walking Dead: Dead Weight’

Season 4, Episode 7: “Dead Weight”

Original air date: Nov. 24, 2013

1.) I promised myself I was done with “The Walking Dead.” It’s been dull this season and I had all I could stand and I could stand no more, to paraphrase Popeye. Yet I got home from work and it was there in my DVR queue. My back hurt from an ill-advised effort to move an old tube television. I couldn’t get comfortable in bed. I figured if anything could make me drowsy, it would be “The Walking Dead.” And I was proven right again.the_walking_dead_blood_logo_magnet

2.) The Governor (David Morrissey) plays house with a bunch of boring characters we met last episode about whom I don’t care. The Governor seems to, but he’s crazy. He proceeds to kill Martinez (Jose Pablo Cantillo), the guy from the Governor’s old town, by throwing him into a pit of zombies. I am not sure why one keeps a pit of zombies in your camp. Maybe it is an aesthetic thing, you know some Frank Lloyd Wright stuff. I never understood architecture. The Governor kills another human we met recently and don’t care about. Suddenly he’s in charge of the camp.

3.) The episode closes with the Governor driving up to the prison. Apparently Rick’s (Andrew Lincoln) and Carl (Chandler Riggs) can’t hear the engine of trucks in noisy maelstrom of their garden. The Governor spies Michonne (Danai Gurira) and Hershel (Scott Wilson) having a cheerful chat. He points a gun at them. The episode ends. Oh, cliffhanger.

4.) Except that 1 second later, the narrator introduces the trailer for next week’s episode. The Governor is going to convince his new band of buddies, one of whom has a tank, to attack the prison. I feel like I’ve seen this before. Wait. We did see this before. It was the same plot of the Season 3 finale. Well, now there’s a tank, at least.

5.) I guess it’s not technically plagiarism because they’re only stealing ideas from themselves. But it is awfully lazy. Some fans weren’t happy there wasn’t a big action movie-style showdown between Rick and the Governor last season. Maybe we’ll get that next week. Hey, maybe it will be a lightsaber duel. That sounds like a terrible idea, but trust me, no bad idea I could come up with would be any worse than the ones the Season 4 writers have already put on screen.

5 reasons why I stopped watching ‘The Walking Dead’

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  1. Unbelievable marksmanship: The headshot is exceptionally difficult to pull off even for top sharpshooters. But in the zombie apocalypse that is “The Walking Dead,” even children are able to consistently shoot zombies in the brain.
  2. Soft skulls: I am not an expert in bone density, but it seems like it is awfully easy to smash zombie skulls in “The Walking Dead.” Skulls are getting crushed by boot stomp and punched through by fists. Bones are one of the few things that survive when the flesh rots of bodies. Maybe the skulls could be a little tougher to squish.
  3. Red shirts: The old gag on the original “Star Trek” series was if you saw a character wearing a red shirt that you didn’t already know, they were probably going to die. That’s been the case of “The Walking Dead” Season 4. The audience is introduced to scores of characters, some for less than 5 minutes of screen time, and then asked to care when they die. I don’t. I’m not surprised when they’re dead.
  4. Bad builders: One consistent threat to the survivors’ prison stronghold has been the zombie hordes pushing against the weakening chain-link fences. The survivors’ solution to this is to lean planks and boards against the fence at an angle. The boards aren’t anchored. They’re just kind of wedged in there. I am not an engineer, but this seems like a pretty lousy solution. A better solution might be to dig a trench. It worked for the Governor and his crew. Behind the trench, build a wall out of concrete and brick. If the survivors are already going out on runs for food, medicine and, in Bob’s case, booze, they could pick up some bricks and mortar or sacks of cement and use those two-by-fours to build a real line of defense.
  5. Boring: Most of the above complains are ticky-tack fouls. I would forgive them if the drama or the action were better quality. But they aren’t. They’re poor. I used to look forward to “The Walking Dead” on Sunday nights. I used to bemoan the fact that it got me so excited, I found it difficult to settle down before going to bed. Now I look at the coming of each week’s episode as a chore. I kept writing about the show because it was fun to poke fun at. But now I’m even tired of that. I’m not dead, but I’m walking away from “The Walking Dead.”